You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
bring money and cleavage
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize