God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
