The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
