Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
