Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
And my parents said I crawled through the house
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
