winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
