She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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