i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
