I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
