I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
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