Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
