one two three fourrrrnication!
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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