So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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