Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
