I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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