is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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