Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
