Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
You work out of a Hotel?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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