i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
