Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
