Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I don't deserve a penis
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
