i just had sex bonerless
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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