don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
