I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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