Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
