i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
