It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
