They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
