That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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