She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
