i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
