I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Green mimosas i think yes
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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