At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
