I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
