Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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