dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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