youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
