Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
