I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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