I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
