What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
We need to get me chipped asap
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
