I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
