omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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