Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Randomize
