Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
