dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
