He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
