Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Can Purell be used as lube?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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