I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
They took my balls.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
