I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
porn star boner night. come get it.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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