My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize