just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
